It must be the phase of the moon. I can't think of any other explanation. Why else would seemingly rational people think that trying to bully me would get me to do what they want? It just doesn't make sense.

I am one of those people that find it hard to say no to people. So if you want something, and ask me nicely, chances are I'll respond and do whatever it is you want, often to my own detriment. But I have another flaw. If you push me or try and bully me I will get my back up and tell you to piss off. Politely mind you. No need to get rude, unless you try and push the point.

So, given my sunny nature, why is it that so many people think that telling me that I must do something or else is going to elicit anything other than a negative result?

I get this at all sorts of levels. From bureaucrats to clients to users,

Don't tell me that I must accept your patch. There is no must about it. It is my prerogative to accept or decline patches. I don't even need a reason (although generally I do have very good reasons, but you may not understand or acknowledge them).

Similarly I can tell you that I don't want to deal with you. There is no law forcing me to offer you services if I don't want to. Nothing personal. There may be dozens of reasons behind my decision. Bottom line is, you have no claim over my time unless I choose to allow it. And until the inevitable fascist takeover occurs I will vigorously defend my right to tell you to fuck off. Politely of course. No need to be rude.

So take this as a friendly suggestion. Ask nicely and you never know your luck. Start the bullying tactics and prepare to be stonewalled. I grew up with bullies, I know how they think, and I know that you must stand up to bullies because the only way they work is by getting you to back down by fear or intimidation. They are generally so insecure that they need to exert power over others, and the only power they have is to intimidate. Don't be intimidated and they have no power.